Ignore when you hear this phrase: ‘Forgive and Forget’. I do not think that forgetting is about forgiveness; remembering, from time to time, what you experienced, can be turned into a lesson. The lesson is a way of learning if you are in school; life is your current MBA. This happened and now I can learn from it. Not this happened, now I can take revenge on that person and make their life miserable.
It is time to look at the power of forgiveness. Forgiveness is about not holding on to righteousness, not wishing the other harm. It has nothing really to do with the other individual or event, the one you need to forgive, the one you need to let go of.
It’s all about compassion, for yourself and everyone else. In Buddhism, compassion is about not wanting the other person to suffer. However, you have to look to yourself first.
“According to Buddhism, compassion is an aspiration, a state of mind, wanting others to be free from suffering. It’s not passive — it’s not empathy alone — but rather an empathetic altruism that actively strives to free others from suffering. Genuine compassion must have both wisdom and loving-kindness.”
With this being said, compassion for yourself is tantamount to your inner and outer peace.
Are you bitter about someone or something that happened in your life? Forgive the person or persons involved, forgive yourself for participating in the event, and move on.
Take yourself out of the prison you have created by holding on to a grudge; forgive them over and over again until all the energy on this individual and event is neutralized.
Still having a difficult time forgiving? Let’s talk for a bit here.